Monday, June 08, 2009

No School Today!

I Cannot Go To School Today!
by Shel Silverstein

"I cannot go to school today"
Said little Peggy Ann McKay.
"I have the measles and the mumps,
A gash, a rash and purple bumps.

My mouth is wet, my throat is dry.
I'm going blind in my right eye.
My tonsils are as big as rocks,
I've counted sixteen chicken pox.

And there's one more - that's seventeen,
And don't you think my face looks green?
My leg is cut, my eyes are blue,
It might be the instamatic flu.

I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,
I'm sure that my left leg is broke.
My hip hurts when I move my chin,
My belly button's caving in.

My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained,
My 'pendix pains each time it rains.
My toes are cold, my toes are numb,

I have a sliver in my thumb.

My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,
I hardly whisper when I speak.
My tongue is filling up my mouth,

I think my hair is falling out.

My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,
My temperature is one-o-eight.
My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,

There's a hole inside my ear.

I have a hangnail, and my heart is ...
What? What's that? What's that you say?
You say today is .............. Saturday?

G'bye, I'm going out to play!"

Just a little culture for ya!
Happy Monday!


Just Dave said...

Shel was such a contridiction. He wrote great childen's books ("The Giving Tree" can still make me tear up) while he also wrote some of the grossest pornography in existence. Go figure.

karisma said...

LOL! Thats cute. We like to go out and play every day. dd3 however goes to school unless its the day Simms 3 comes out, then she ditches school sneaks out with her older sisters and they all come back and brainwash the little ones to play too.

And thanks, thats just the kind of culture I like ;-)

captain corky said...

I gotta remember a few of those for the next time I need to call in. ;)

Trukindog said...

Hmm, I got lots of grins and giggles out of this but "culture"???...yeah I think I missed that part. ;-)

Hoosier Girl said...

Just Dave - Yeah, I was shocked to find out he drew cartoons for Playboy, too. But his poetry is classic.

Karisma - I had to post this. As soon as I got up this morning, the first words that came to my mind were "I cannot go to school today....Glad you liked it.

Captain Corky - Yeah, just be sure your boss hasn't read Shel Silverstein! It might work.....

T-dog - Um, sweetie.....Shel Silverstein is a well-known author and poet. You know, as in've heard of them, right?


Superwoman said...

I love those books, wow, I had no idea in my little niave mind that he had drawn porn. eesh. that's too bad, what a disapointment.